True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her…
In the summer of 1976 on the way home from an Alice Cooper concert, Charlie started to melt on the pavement. It was too hot in L.A and he melted, like a pink bitch. Luckily though, there was Eric Phillips, a local crocodile who dabbled in black magic. He took pity on Charlie, and scraped him off the floor with a pair of fish slicers. He poured him into an antique soup ladel, and boarded his magic carpet, destination, Alaska. Eric Phillips decided to refreeze Charlie, but in his cold blooded reptilian haste, he refroze him into the shape of a hoover. Charlie wasn’t phased though, he just zoomed about the place, sucking up Inuits. The Inuits didn’t mind. They loved it in Charlie’s big tight warm belly pouch, and they refused to come out. Charlie said, “I’m cool with that,” and set fire to a posh hammer to make it official. The downside was that the Inuits suffocated imediately. It was air-tight in there. Charlie panicked, and fired the tiny Inuit bullets into to Eric’s crocodile peepers. The green shape, was frozen. After a quick drink, Charlie stole Eric Phillip’s magic carpet, and left for Seattle. Charlie was racked with guilt. He’d killed 50 Inuits, no one needs that. He decided to spend the rest of his life putting small hairstyles onto boots, monkey nuts, trumpets, and spanners.
The state of Queensland, Australia is facing the most violent, frightening, deadly flash flooding it has seen since 1974. Torrential rain has been lashing at Queensland for over 36 hours, causing water levels to rise at an average of 16 centimetres each hour.
10 have just been confirmed dead, with an overwhelming 78 being reported as missing.
If you are able to donate to the Flood Donation Appeal, please do. I scraped together what money I could because each dollar that they receive will go towards helping the thousands of people who have been affected by this devastating force of nature.